Sleepless Nights (memerlukan kesabaran yang tinggi)

Yesterday was Nawfal's second immunisation shot. And macam tau tau je dia nak kene cucuk the next day tu, malam tu dia punye lah cranky! Duk asik meragam je, tak mo diletak. Letak je dia meraung menjerit macam kene dera. hoho.. Mencabar mencabar~~ To make matters worse, dia macam tak nak dengan mama dia ni.. Punya lah macam-macam cara mama dia try to make him stop crying, but he won't stop. Duk terus melalak sambil meronta-ronta, menendang-nendang. Adoyai nawfal, awak tu dah lah dah 6.2 kg sekarang ni! Mama tak larat nak dukung lama-lama tau!

To make matters even worst, ayah dia demam selsema la pulak masa tu. So tak leh nak dukung dia sebab takut berjangkit. Adoi, lagi la mama nia ni terkapai-kapai. Macam dah nak lemas dalam laut, duk panggil-panggil orang tolong tapi takde sape nak tolong. Haa tu la, dah tau tak reti berenang, yang nak pegi tengah laut tak pakai life-jacket tu apahal! (ehh? lari tajuk.) Anyway, setelah mencuba pelbagai cara tapi masih tak berjaya memujuk si pipi tembam tu, akhirnya ayah dia yang demam selsema tu terpakse juga take over. Yerlah, kalau terus biarkan si mama ni yang pegang, silap-silap kene campak atas katil pulak budak tu.. Sebab dah cube banyak cara pun tak lut jugak, rase nak givap dah mama ni nawfal oii! Nasib baik laaa dia nak dengan ayah dia. Ayah dia pujuk-pujuk kejap, nyanyi-nyanyi sikit, terus dia tido. Pheww~~ thank you suami! you're a life saver! (suamiku life-jacket ku?)

Fuhh.. setelah mengalami episod-episod begini, barulah aku paham cmana boleh wujudnye kes-kes dera anak. Yerlah, kalau tahap kesabaran tak tinggi, memang dah kene dah budak tu.. Aku yang tahap kesabaran di aras yang agak tinggi ni pun dah rase nak hilang sabar, inikan pulak org yang panas baran. Yer dak? Seriously, until you become a parent yourself, you'll have no idea how it feels. The hopeless and helplessness feeling of hearing the child wailing without mercy. Aiyohh.. I salute all the single mothers who has to deal with this on their own. Seriously, I don't know how they do it.

Huu disebabkan sepanjang malam tu nawfal duk meragam, I couldn't sleep at all. So I decided to take EL je. Sebabnye kepala dah mula rase pening-pening lalat. Mata pun rase dah tak berapa mampu nak bukak, badan pun dah rase nak demam. So rehat je la.. Fuhhh.. ni baru dua bulan ni.. Still a long way to go.. Tapi orang kata these first few months je camni. Bile dah besar sikit nanti tak lah teruk sangat. Huh. Yeke? Lets just hope so, aite? Nawfal, please be a good boy for mama and ayah..

Ironically, babies ni can't be predicted. Bila time dia good mood, alahai adorable nyerr.. Boleh borak-borak dengan dia, dia pun respon buat bunyi-bunyi yang tak boleh di interpretasi. Senyum-senyum, jelir-jelir lidah, alahai comelnyerr~~ sejuk hati dibuatnyer.. Tapi kalau time dia meragam tu... YA AMPUNNN~~~ nawfallll!! rase nak jerit-jerit tarik-tarik rambut (macam emoticon kat YM tu).. fuhh fuhhh mencabar kesabaran.. Nasib baik la kata-kata sorang nurse mase aku bersalin dulu sentiase terngiang-ngiang kat telinga aku ni "Kak, sayang anak, kak. Penat akak bawak dia 9 bulan dalam perut.." Hmm bile pikir-pikir, betul gak tu. Punya lah aku mengusung dia ke hulu ke hilir dalam perut dulu, dah keluar ni tak kan nak di sia-sia kan. Betul tak? Maka, tarik nafas panjang-panjang, PUSSSHHHHH~~~ (ehh?!) heheh. Tarik nafas panjang-panjang, istighfar banyak-banyak, dan teruskan lah memujuk.. Buang perasaan negatif jauh-jauh, sebab mungkin babies can feel that negative aura..

Fuhh~~ Kesimpulannye, to all future mothers, be mentally prepared for this. Kumpulkan kesabaran banyak-banyak. Trust me, you'll need it. To future brides, make sure you choose someone who don't mind taking the night shift for the baby. Coz you can't handle this on your own (well, I can't). Make sure bakal suami sanggup bersengkang mata menjaga anak bersama-sama. And it's imperative that he took over when you've lost your cool, in order to prevent your name from appearing in the news as a child abuser. huhu. Enuff said.

I'm a Mom!

Yes, yet a new blog. In which I hope I don't have to set private, since I think I have a lot to share with the world. In which I hope would reach out to whoever in need of reading it. Why set up a new blog you would ask? Because I think the whole experience of being a mother is so priceless that it deserve a right to be written, and to be shared with other moms, as well as all moms-to-be out there.. (and in case my children need help in reminding how challenging it is to bring them to this world. ehem.)

Alright. Enuff intro. It's time for me to be me! Yay! A new mom at that. Not quite a hot one though. More like messy-I-dont-know-how-the-other-moms-do-it kinda mom. I mean seriously, how do you guys make it look so easy?! It's not!! First of all, I haven't got back to my old size (still another 8kg to go!), so I can't fit into my old clothes and have to get new ones (ok, there's a yay! there). And then having to breastfeed really made you scrutinize your wardrobe into choosing which can be worn and which can't (in which almost 80% can't be worn). and then the whole sleepless nights thingy. Aiyohhhhh....

Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining. I'm happy to be blessed with such an adorable baby boy. It's just that I don't know how to adjust to this new role. and how the heck do you manage to look good while doing it?! Look at me for an instance. I don't even have time to take my bath sometimes what's with the baby keep on bawling if I don't carry him around, not mentioning to dress up prettily since I keep thinking, 'whats the point? I would end up with the baby's puke anyway'. Which is so not good right? I mean, I'm still young *cough*, I should at least look youthful right? But noooooo... I sooo looked like 'mak-mak' now. Gosh, how did I end up here? Especially since I promised myself I won't get there. Well I guess it's easier said than done huh? 

It has been two and a half month since I delivered a healthy baby boy. And somehow it seemed ages ago. Some would say I'm still new at this and should give myself a break. But I feel like I should have been in control by now. and I'm soooo not! Heck, being a virgo is so tough sometimes! (they say virgos are the worst self-critique). So tell me people, how long does it take for you to be in control? Am I doing ok so far? coz sometimes I still have doubts about my skills and knowledge as a mother. I mean, how am I supposed to know that I'm supposed to clean the baby's ears, and nose and etcetera. Man, maybe I should get one of those 'how to be a mother for dummies' book. Coz I sure need one.

At this trying time we thank God for mothers. Coz if it weren't for my mother, I would have no idea how to be a mom myself. And only then we'll realized what an inspiration our mother was, having to raise us gracefully, without falling apart. So this is a shout out to all mothers: Thank you Mum! You're an inspiration! (psstt, how did you do it?!)



P/s: I have no idea why I'm writing in English, since the name of the blog is in Malay. Hoh krisis identiti betul aku ni. Dahlah bahasa inggeris berterabur.. Haihhhhhh~~ Ok ok next entry in Malay ok?